This is the beginning of a series of posts which are aimed at inspiring me and everyone around me to just live life taking chances. It had been a long, tiring journey for me to have lost myself so completely to mould to others’ opinion of me. This is me, taking one day at a time, living it a little, and breaking free…
Life’s strange you know. I’ve seen so many people living arduous lives and had I been in their place, maybe I’d have given up a really long time ago. But these people go on living, hoping that maybe one day, they’ll be loved too. They’ve loved so deeply that they have stopped existing. Yes, we all want to preserve a part of us from others, no matter how important they be. But sometimes, just sometimes, when you’re looking away, that latch you put on the door to save a part of you from others, is opened. And you don’t realize it. You love so wholly and completely that forgetting your own self doesn’t really seem to be a big deal. You don’t really “”get”” the concept when people say that you shouldn’t be completely immersed in one person. That must be exhilarating. To be able to be 100% committed. That requires a special kind of courage and lord knows, we don’t have too much of it going around anymore.
We keep ourselves distant to some extent or the other coz even when we love, we make a provision for being hurt. We call it self-preservation and we call it pride. When the other person behaves in the same manner with us, it’s stunning how quickly our perception changes and it becomes ego. Yes, we’re hypocritical.
So let me just take that shield of “”self preservation”” away, just for a moment. And really give myself wholly and completely to someone. Let me, knowing that I could be hurt, prostrate myself at someone’s feet simply because to me, they are divinity.
Even though we haven’t always got what we wanted from Him, and He’s hurt us so as to open our eyes to lessons we must learn, we still give ourselves completely to Him. And while at times, I think that He totally sucks at his job, with hindsight I see, He suffered my hostility to do a good deed for me.
Hurt is inevitable in life. And it can’t be quantified. But what we can do is live with it. Try to change it, mould it. It’s only if we face it head-on again and again will we succeed. And while I realize that its scary, facing it might just be my liberation.