I’m not even going to try to come up with a “title” for this one. I’ve been doing that for all the RCs in English Lectures and failing miserably. I dont like my “titles” to give away all about the text and cryptic really isn’t me at 3am. 😉
Recently, I joined a tutorial to prepare for my CAT exam. As a result; for the past few months, I’ve spent almost all my time reading up, studying or trying to solve math sheets in the hopes of getting through my dream college(s).
Truth be told, I have no “real” idea of which college I want to go to. Or why, for that matter does a particular stream sound more intriguing. The first question we’re asked by every new faculty member (and believe me, there’s a new one every 3 days!) is the reason why we want to pursue a career in management.
I give all the right answers. How it’s a vital trait to possess. How it develops a person to his complete potential. How I want to be an entrepreneur with my own start-up. Blah-blah-blah. But in my heart of hearts, I know that what I say is a gunk load of crap.
Most entrepreneurs I’ve seen haven’t got fancy degrees from brilliant colleges. They had an idea, a vision, and a drive to succeed. And that for me is all it really takes to become something. No college or institution can teach you those traits. And you cant simply expect to pick up traits on how to have fresh ideas. This is what makes it tougher for me to really explain to them as to why I’m studying for a degree which I don’t really think will transform me into the next wonder of the business world.
I find it tough to explain to them that I want to be an MBA cause it just feels right. I find it difficult to look people in the eye and explain to them that it’s a silent certainty within me which says; “this is what I want to study.” There is no other reason really. Just that, if I have to spend two years of my life studying something, this is the subject I’d pick.
People close to me like my aunts and sisters are infuriated with this response. Mostly because they think, I have a better shot at being a chef, a dancer, a writer, OR a CA (shudder, puke, panic attack). My dad thinks that between my whimsical desires of becoming a bartender, food critic and wine taster, and studying literature or photography, he’d take his chances with the last two hands down.
I’ve spent a great deal of time, effort and passion working on most of these interests and yet I don’t want to study them. Not in the traditional, text-book, get a degree sort of way. I’d rather fumble through them and form my own opinions and tastes.
I guess, you could say I’m whimsical. But isnt it reason enough that it resonates within me?
I have a personal interview and group discussion session lined up. I know this is the first question I have to face. And unlike for others, this is my personal toughie.
What shames me the most, is that all the times that I was asked this question, I never once spoke my heart. I cared too much about not conforming to the general idea of what a student should answer with. For all my expressions and honesty here, I couldn’t look them in the eye, and say “I’m doing this cause I want to. That is reason enough.”